A Return to Doubting

I have run and I have hidden,

In places never meant for me.

While there I have known many pleasures.

Only to find they end in solitude.

In anger, frustration and some regret,

I have sought to return where I belong.

A place I do not want to be.

But a place I must be.


In word God seems to be so big,

Yet in practice I find Him to be small.

Do understand; I mean no blasphemy,

If only He would do as I ask.


You may say I need to be rescued,

And in this there may be much truth.

But how am I to be saved,

By one I cannot understand nor love?


I have known God with many words,

Yet my heart remains empty of love.

I have walked many, many miles,

And find I have accompanied a stranger.